Furthering my post on national stereotypes I present you a joke related to the subject:
“Heaven is where the police are British, the cooks are French, the mechanics are German, the lovers are Italian and it is all organised by the Swiss. Hell is where the police are German, the cooks are English, the mechanics are French, the lovers are Swiss, and it is all organised by the Italians”. [Nov 2006]
See also: volksgeist
Update May 25, 2011: Found the source, this joke supposedly is from record tycoon Ahmet Ertegun of Atlantic Records, first attested in a 1982 Google Books record[1]:
I guess Purgatory is where America invades both Heaven and Hell and imposes cowboy capitalist market economics on everything.
Who is the author of “Heaven is where the police are British, the cooks are French, the mechanics are German, the lovers are Italian and it is all organised by the Swiss. Hell is where the police are German, the cooks are English, the mechanics are French, the lovers are Swiss, and it is all organised by the Italians”?
Thanks,
Hi Barbaroux,
I’ve looked into the authorship, impossible to trace, like jokes, where do they come from, where do they go. Ke mana, dari mana?* No-one can tell.
Death of the author, I suppose in this case.
Indonesian, “where do you come from, where are you going?”
I found this joke in a book of English and there´s a part I don´t get, why are the police British in Heaven? I mean, I know nothing about the British police (I´m Argentinian), what´s the stereotype of them. Thanks!
British police are unarmed (!!! where else do you get that?), well-paid – therefore you get quality, not monkeys and answerable to the people they serve – the public (so they follow the law and are not above it). In general, bad apples accepted, they are approachble and helpful and intelligent…and can’t kill you…
From my experience of police in 24 other countries I am not afraid of British coppers…
This little gem dates back at least to the 1980s, where I saw it quoted in a magazine article. Plenty of worldly wisdom here, for those who can lighten up…
New twist on it: I Heaven Americans are comedians and Swiss are bankers.
Hell: American bankers, Swiss comedians.
@author of this blog: thanks a lot for this quote and your explenation, I also wanted to know who the author was because I found this quote on the internet. :)
@dman: Well, there are some really good Swiss comedians ;-).
British did not carry guns until just recently, making them use good sense and not be bullies
I thought it was from Hetalia. The series where all the countries are represented by people.
Speaking of guns, So cops who carry guns automatically become bullies who don’t use good sense? I wonder if some of you people who say these sort of things have ever actually been to anywhere outside Europe. I remember a Russian who moved here expecting to find American Indians in traditional dress on every street corner. He was, to say the least, a bit disappointed about that. I realize that French are much superior to Russians, as well as to everyone else, but when I hear the word “cowboy” used in a derogatory sense to refer to an economic system that has brought more prosperity to more poor souls that just about any other, despite its many crimes and shortcomings, I wonder how deeply the commentator has really looked into things. It is easy to simply string together derogatory cliches, and saves one from actually having to think much.
dman: Right on. That’s a thoughtful, funny, and original one. I don’t object to jokes on Americans, as long as they meet those criteria. I get irritated at the gratuituos use of phrases like “cowboy capitalist market economics,” but I suppose that is the intended effect, besides being code for “I am a superior Euro environmentalist socialist who wants a one world government controlled from Brussels (but still protected by American military).
Anthony, let me tell you where we get our ideas about the American cops, from the reality police shows and experience 1st and 2nd hand. From all the acting mucho that a lot of them. . Plus why are you acting so touchy? The way you talk about the Canadians and other countries is disgusting, you have no respect for others, not even for fellow Americans. And who says Europeans are superior Euro environmentalist socialist. It’s not something the people wanted. And what about the G8,? they’re the ones who want one world goverment.
dman, I’m afraid to say this but in international trade, the dollar rules and the Americans are the bankers.
It’s a joke people!!!!!
To the comment above,
They must all be Austrian. That’s why they don’t get it.
I’m american and personally, I feel that most americans think we’re more important than everyone else. Unfortunatly, most of the time, atleast from what I’ve seen, us americans dont do a very good job at making our nation look good. It also doesnt bother me if this offends somebody becasue this is my PERSONAL opinion. On a lighter note, Heaven would also have Mexican gardeners and Swedish doctors. In Hell, the Mexicans would organize everything while the Italians are all drugged up and the Swedish would be the disapinarians…
How could the world take the US seriously considering the bozos we have had for our last two presidents.
Does this remind anybody of Hetalia?
Hetalia uses this old joke frequently, with Roman Empire singing it.
A twist: In Heaven, the dancers are Brazilian, the gardeners are Mexican, the doctors are Swedish, and the military are American. In Hell, the dancers are American, the gardeners are Swedish, the doctors are Brazilian, and the military is Mexican.
Hey, what’s this about Mexican gardeners? Everybody knows that in L.A. it’s a status symbol to have a JAPANESE gardener. In fact, there’s a joke about a Japanese guy in L.A. who was so wealthy he had a Jewish gardener!
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Heaven is where the police are British? Tell that to Stephen Lawrence’s family.